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Contestant number 1, I believe first impressions last forever So let's say you were to come over to my parent's house And have dinner with me and my family, tell me What you'd do to make that first impression really stick Let's see, well I'd have to think about it I might show up in a tux but I doubt it I'd probably just show up naked like I always do And look your mama in the eye and tell her fuck you Hurry up bitch I'm hungry, I smell spaghetti I pinch her limpy ass and tell her get the food ready Your dad would probably start trippin' and get me pissed I'd have to walk up and bust him in his fuckin' lip It's dinner time, we're hearin' grace from your mother I'd pull a forty out and pour some for your little brother I'm steady starin' at your sister, I'll tell you this You know for only 13 she got some big tits After that, your dad would try to trip again And only this time I'd put the 40 to his chin After your mom does the dishes and the silverware I'd dry fuck her till I nut in my underwear Now let's meet contestant number 2 He's a psychopathic deranged crackhead freak Who works for the dark carnival He says women call him stretch nutz Sharon, let's hear your question I like a man who's not afraid to show his true emotion A man who expresses himself in his own special way Number 2, if you fell in love with me Exactly how would you let me know?
First thing, I could never love you You sound like richy bitch yo, fuck you But if I did, I'd probably show you that I care By takin' all these other motherfuckers outta here I'd go through your phone book and wack 'em all Then find contestant number 1 and break his fuckin' jaw (What?
Grab your titties, and stretch em down past your waist Let go, and watch em both spring up in your face I'd sing love songs to ya, the best I can Get ya naked and hit it like a caveman Then we'd go through the beach and walk in the sand I'd throw a little sand in your face and say I'm just playin As you spit it all out, I'll fuck your back Grab your underwear and wedge it up your ass crack!!!!
(Host) Well it sounds like contestant #2 is just overflowing with sensetivity Sharon, It's a tough choice so far, Sharon, let's have your last question And see which one is gonna win the right to your next date (Sharon) Ok, if we were at a dance club, And you both noticed me at the same time, Tell me, how would you each get my attention And what would your pick up lines be? Ok, first, I'd slide up to the bar And tell you that I can't believe how fuckin fat you are! I'd order you a drink, and stir it with my dick And then to get your attention in a crowded place, I'd simply walk up and stick my nuts in your face!
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Hurry up bitch I'm hungry, I smell spaghetti, I'd pinch her limpy ass and tell her get the food ready!
(Host Intro) Let's meet contestant #1 He's a schitzophrenic serial killer clown Who says women love his sexy smile. Tell me what you'd do to make that first impression really stay.
(Sharon) Contestant #1, I believe first impressions last forever, So let's say you were to come over to my parents' house And have dinner with me and my family.
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